Moderately Conservative Or Conservatively Moderate

Lets face it, most of us, like me, are neither here nor there. More specifically as Indians struck in the middle of a social and economic revolution, we are standing at one of the biggest crossroads in " our " modern times. The problem with being born during these changing times of transformation are many. The one that manifests itself most severely is that you constantly strive to align your ethos with the moving times and still somehow hope to preserve your formative values. In the process not only the initial values are getting eroded, but more seriously, you tend to end up in a situation where your identity is blurred by what you are (were) and what you thought you should be. I know there is a lot of overlap between being assimilative, i.e. a liberal by my line of thought and being accomodative, i.e. moderately conservative. Both are equally justifiable in thier own right, depending upon which side of the fence you are.

Most of us are never sure really where to draw the line. While growing up, as you realize that there is a huge gap between what was spoon fed to you against what you actaully feel should have been; I am sure most of us would have thought at some point in life if I really am what I should be (can be ?).

I personally feel thats my basic problem. I mean is it enough to live a life of preset roles, responsibilities, expectations. A recipie of scripts you are supposed to enact through the theatre they call life. And if it so, how many ? Some of us may well go the safer path, tried and tested (and expected ...) but then is it all about life? I feel life has to be more than a preset sequence of instructions, with definite input and deterministic output.

This can get increasingly painfull as you realise that most of the people (mostly all) around you, whom you thought of as being understanding turn otherwise. If that happens with your role models, then you are in for a shock.

To say the least here, when you feel streched out between life from the inside and outside, there can just be one call that can be followed - your own inner voice.... However tough the journey be.